Thursday, April 23, 2009

just a hoehum day

"Sigh" im just in a quite mood right now as it feels my mind is racing a mile a minute.

found out yesterday that my dad isnt doing to good, you cant tell by lookin at him thats for sure and thats whats so scary! my sister dragged him to the drs because he hates drs, gee wonder where i get that from......... she took him to the eye drs last week because he just cant see that good and so he let her take him and it was no good news. hes got bleeding behind his eyes and thats from being diabetic and not taking care of it and ignoring it like everything else. so then went to regular dr ysterday and they checked him over and did ekg and he was told that hes had a heart attack at some point and has had a stroke and hes got a clogged artery somewheres, high blood pressure, high cholestrol,so next week hes gotta get a stress test done.

im trying not to worry about this and just pray that he gets himself all taken care of and he will be fine but............ you cant make someone take care of them selves who dont want to. hes so stubbern and set in his ways, always thinks that it will just go away, you'll get over it etc etc. to this day he still doesnt understand my disease and thinks it will just poof go away and tells me i just need to exercise, move around. well daddy your exercising and lifting weights and how great of shape you think your in your not, your falling apart! so im not suppose to let him no i no anything , he doesnt want anyone to no but of course my sis told me, thank god! i mean his kids should no whats going on hes are only father.

when i talked to him ysterday on the phone and it was a nice conversation he told me he loved couple times and when i got off the phone reality set in that this is some serouis stuff, hes a ticking time bomb and just doesnt get it! i dont want to loose him , we may not have always gotten along but hes always been there for me and a great father and i dont no what id do without him. i think alot of times when bad things happen i just try not to think about it so maybe i dont have to face it, maybe its from being a kid watching my mom slowley die, i dont no but i cant hide from this and neither can he. hes 68 yrs old and needs to be around for along time! sorry this post is a downer but iv just got alot on my mind. hope everyone has a good day! hugs


garnett109 said...

our thoughts and prayers are with your dad

Missy said...

I hope your father will take better care of himself. Continue to tell him how important his health is to you and your sister and how much you need him around. In the end, it's up to him. Take care friend.


Michelle said...

I'll be praying for your dad. I hope he'll get help for his medical conditions.

I just had a stress test yesterday - its not as bad as I thought it was going to be.

If your dad isn't up to walking on the treadmill - he can do the one sitting down. That's what I did.

Hang in there!



Janie said...

So sorry to hear about your dad. Will keep him in my prayers... and you too. Blessings, Janie

It's Just Katie! said...

My thoughts and prayers will go up for successful results. Be strong and take care of you my friend,

Lucy said...

AWW Tracy, you have such a big heart. I got your card today!!! ThaNK YOU, Thank you. You don't know how much a kind act like that means to we older people. I am so sorry that your fATHER IS not doing well. I had a brother who would not take care of his diabetes. He wound up unable to see at all and died of a brain hemorrage at 50 years of age. It was not a pretty sight and he was the rock of our family. We missed him terribly. I truly hope that he can turn this around but Tracy, I had 3 diabetics in my family and my sister was the only one to take good care of herself but in the long run she died of cancer. It is hard to have to do all the things they should, but Tracy he is the only oine that can do it. I go for another MRI tomorrow, this time on the front thoracic and my chest. I will write in my blog tomorrow about the Dr. I will say he was very nice this time.

Missie said...

I'll be keeping him in my prayers!

Try to have a nice weekend.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I didnt know about your dad. Im so sorry to hear all that is wrong! But hes a tough old goat and I hope this will "scare" him into seeing the doc and getting better. Love ya. Hugs. WW

Lucy said...

Tracy I hope you are feeling a little better about your dad but it is so hard to get them to take care of themselves. Don't ever feel that you can not talk to your blogger friends even if it is a downer. It is your blog and that , as far as I am concerned is what blogs are for. Our Thoughts and Concerns. No one has to read it. I for one would never stop. I am headed to the bone density clinic tomorrow and that better be all. I know insurance won't even begin to cover it because it is prescriptipon ins. Lucy

Anonymous said...